


The Songbird in Paradise

by i_have_an_au_fetish (luciferslegions)



Category: Norse Religion & Lore, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Aesir-Vanir War, Alternate Universe - World War II, Blood and Gore, Concentration Camps, F/M, Holocaust, Imprisonment, Inspired by Novel, Inspired by Real Events, Marriage of Convenience, Psychological Torture, Sexual Abuse, Starvation, Triggers, Underage Sex, WIP, fem!Loki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-24
Updated: 2015-04-11
Packaged: 2018-03-08 01:10:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3190205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luciferslegions/pseuds/i_have_an_au_fetish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the true story of how Slovakian Jews, Helena and Rozinka Citronova, were kept alive in Auschwitz when SS guard, Franz Wunsch, fell in love with Helena's song.  </p>
<p>Fem!Loki as Helena; Jarnsaxa as Rozinka; Thor as Franz.  And the Dokkalfar (Dark Elves) are the sneaky Swiss.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I first learned about this story after reading Bill O'Reilly's _Killing Patton_ , and I was inspired to write a fic about it. For a long time I had wanted to write a _Pianist_ AU, but I just never got around to it. Besides the fact that I absolutely love the movie, but I also got the idea because "Jotun" sounds like the German word for "Jew" (Juden). I get ideas from weird places. Anyway, that's my excuse. 
> 
> Just a note that my ending will be different from what actually happened to the Citronova sisters and Franz. Also, even though it's in the tags, there's lots of gore and explicit content. Seriously, if something makes you squeamish, go read a fic with sunshine and candy and puppies. And don't complain to me that it's too graphic for you, because I'll ignore you.
> 
> ONE MORE THING! Since they speak different languages, the text is going to look different. Regular text will be for Jotuns, _italics_ will be for Aesir, and **bolded** will be for Dokkalfar. I don't think I'll actually be featuring the Vanir so I don't need to worry about them.

It was the middle of the night when they came. The Aesir soldiers. They were called “soldiers,” but they didn't act like it. The ones on the front lines, fighting in the war against the Vanir, could be considered soldiers. The ones who came in the night and dragged people out of their homes were not true soldiers, just goons.

After the Aesir broke down the front door, they told the people inside to pack one bag, then be ready to leave when they came back. The residents knew better than to bring a lot of money with them, because it would all be taken from them anyway. So they mostly packed a possession they absolutely couldn't leave behind, at least one pair of clothes for each family member, and they would hide bread in their shoes. Squished, smelly bread was better than no bread at all.

It was much harder for large households, like the watchmaker's family. He and his wife had four children. They only packed for three of them, because their oldest daughter was at the hospital after she started having contractions. She was expected to deliver a baby boy any day now. It had been difficult to get her to a hospital, because after the Jotuns were moved into the ghettos, there were no medical facilities nearby. She had to be smuggled inside a newspaper truck.

When all of the Jotuns were gathered in the courtyard, the false soldiers began forcing them into the train. Many, trying to escape, dropped their bags. Those who ran were shot. The shouts and commands of the soldiers were drowned out by screams of terror. The watchmaker and his family were unable to stay together. The mother, daughter and oldest son were on one train car, the father and younger son on another. They dropped their bag in the panic of the crowd.

The train was loud. The sobs and moans of the passengers were deafening. The silence of the courtyard, occupied only by lost and abandoned possessions, was haunting. 

For hours upon hours, perhaps even days, the train traveled south to Asgard. The Jotuns knew what their fate was to be. It wasn't the luxuries of its native citizens. It was gunshots in the night, the stench of corpses, torture and abuse. Hell was waiting for them with open arms.

The watchmaker's wife died on the train, as well as several hundred others. She had been sick for months, so it was only a matter of time. She wouldn't have lasted long in the camp anyway. Brother and sister held onto each other. Just like all Jotuns, they had pale skin, black hair and dark eyes. These were traits that were not shared with their enemy.

When the train began to brake, the people inside were jostled and fell over. As soon as it was completely still, compartment doors slid open and the soldiers began dragging people out. The bodies of people who died on the way were thrown from the train cars and hit the ground with a crack as bones shattered. It must have been so the train would be empty for the next group; and the smell. Again, some tried to run, and gunshots were everywhere. It was foolish. Where were they planning on going? 

It was pouring rain, and thick mud caked their shoes and ankles. In some places it was slippery from puddles, so people tumbled to the ground and got mud in their eyes and mouths. Those who didn't get up fast enough were shot.

As the Jotuns were led towards the front gate, people started screaming again. The false soldiers were separating the men from the women. Some were fighting back, spouses trying to stay together and parents trying to hold onto their children; all were immediately shot. Infants and toddlers were ripped from their mothers' arms. When the soldiers stepped away, the mothers would hold their babies, blood and battered brains covering the front of their clothing. 

“Helblindi! Helblindi, don't leave me!” As soon as she grabbed onto his sleeve, her brother yanked his arm free.

“No, Loki! They'll shoot you!”

“But—”

“It'll be alright, Loki!” He was buried in the crowd. “It'll be alright...!”

The gates slammed shut, and she couldn't see the men anymore. Her mother was dead, her sister wasn't here, her father and brothers were on the other side of the wall. She had nobody. She was thirteen years old and she was alone.

Loki had to force herself to remain standing, so they wouldn't shoot her, but all she wanted to do was curl into a ball and cry. She didn't care that she was trudging through mud that had now reached her shins. Suffocating in mud would be preferable to imprisonment in this place.

There was a soldier standing at the front, shouting at them. The women were looking at each other and murmuring. He was speaking in the Aesir language, so none of them understood what he was saying. Except Loki. She had studied other languages in her free time, and by that it meant most of her day. Loki, as well as a lot of other Jotun girls, didn't go to school because parents could only afford to pay for a male child's education. While her father was at his shop making or repairing watches and clocks, her mother was home with the two girls. Every year Loki would receive a foreign language book for her birthday, and up to this point, she was fluent in Aesir, Vanir, and somewhat fluent in the Dokkalfar dialect of Elvish. For a long time, she was worried that all of those nights reading and studying would be a waste of time. Now she was thankful that she persevered.

If she understood him correctly, the soldier was telling them that they would all be assigned to different jobs. Depending on the job and how well they performed would reflect in how they were fed. When he started talking about “Valhalla,” the storage building where all of their possessions were being held and sorted, Loki had to keep herself from laughing. The fact that this place was called “paradise” was ironic to her. Or maybe it was meant to be a joke on them. 

While he was speaking, guards walked towards them, holding bundles of clothing. They appeared to be dresses, and not the kind one would wear to a dinner party.

_“Now get undressed, all of you!”_ The women backed away, eying the guards warily. Finally having enough of their incompetence, he grabbed the closest girl and started ripping her clothes off her body. She looked to be the same age as Loki. After he had stripped her bare, he threw her shredded garments into the mud. She was shivering and trying to cover herself as much as possible. _“Well? Do you want the same thing to happen to you?”_

Loki turned around and put her hands on the shoulders of the women nearest to her.

“Take your clothes off. Just do as he says and you won't get hurt. Tell the others.” 

There was a sea of whispers, and a moment later they slowly removed their garments. Loki observed the others, hoping nobody would try to fight. After they were all naked, the guards handed out the dresses. When it was Loki's turn, it was the soldier who had spoken, not a guard. He was scrutinizing her, still holding onto her dress. A few more seconds passed then he dropped it in the mud at her feet. Loki had a hard time putting the garment on because she was trembling so much. He knew that she was the one who translated the message. Whether or not this was a good thing, Loki couldn't say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The storage building "Valhalla" is based on the one they had in Auschwitz, which was called "Canada". It was named by the prisoners who worked there because it seemed like a sort of utopia compared to the rest of the camp, and it's what they imagined Canada might be like.


	2. Chapter 2

It rained through the night and early the next morning. Many of the women, probably men as well, became sick from overexposure in the rain and cold air. The quarters they were given were very cramped, with hardly any room to walk. Three-layered bunk beds lined the walls, and four people shared each bed. There were leaks in the ceiling, so they placed buckets on the floor to catch the dripping water; the buckets were supposed to be used for holding urine and feces. 

Breakfast consisted of cold broth with a potato (for some of the lucky ones), and bread that fell apart in their hands. They got splinters in their knees and fingers when they tried to grab all of the crumbs from the wooden floor. Some of the crumbs fell between the boards and a few women had to be restrained when they tried to pull up the floorboards. Instead of finding food they ended up ripping their fingernails off.

Loki slurped at her broth and had her bread gathered in her dress. She didn't get a potato in her soup. As she watched the frenzy from her bed, she made a promise to herself that she would never turn out like that. No matter what, she would not go insane.

When the guards came, all of the women were led out of their cabins and gathered together in a large group. Again, the same soldier from the day before was talking, but they didn't understand. It was visible on his face that he was growing tired of this, so he scanned the group before pushing through. He came back out dragging Loki behind him, and his grip was so tight it nearly snapped her arm in half.

_“This is how it's going to work. I'm going to read out their job assignments, and you are going to translate for them. Understand?”_ Loki nodded slowly. 

He had her stand next to him, and he glared at her once more before looking down at the papers in his hands. Loki released a breath, then said the first number. When the Jotuns were moved to the ghettos, they not only lost their homes but also their humanity. Now there were numbers tattooed on their arms. They no longer had names.

When it was all over, the women were separated into several groups, then each group was taken away by two guards to where they would be working. Loki was assigned to work in Valhalla, sorting through people's belongings and setting aside any gold, jewelry or money to be used for the Aesir war effort. The workers had free reign of every other item; they could take as many clothing items, suitcases, and anything that wasn't valuable as they wanted. 

Loki considered herself lucky. It was indoors and one of the less strenuous jobs. She was with seven other girls, varying in age. One girl was as old as Loki, maybe a year older, and the eldest was close to forty. Many of the older prisoners were killed if they couldn't work, so it was fortunate that this woman ended up here.

It was a rather repetitive job, but Loki knew that she should be grateful. And she was. She only wished to know how her father and brothers were doing, as well as what had become of her sister. 

A commotion at the front of the room made all of the women look up from their work, but they quickly started again when they saw movement. Three guards walked in, one obviously very drunk. They were all assigned to oversee the proceedings within Valhalla, to make note of progress, and to make sure that the workers didn't try to steal any gold.

_“So,”_ the drunk guard blurted out, _“what's this rumor I hear that there's a Jotun that speaks our language? Probably a load of horseshit. They're too stupid to learn even their own language.”_

_“It's not a rumor. She's right there.”_

Loki froze, then slowly looked around at her co-workers. They were all averting their gazes. She turned her attention back to sorting, but she couldn't keep a solid hold on anything. She dropped the blouse she had been folding when a hand grabbed her arm and spun her around. Like all of the other Aesir, he had blonde hair, neatly trimmed as per military regulations, with blue eyes. But his were bloodshot from the alcohol, and he reeked of it.

_“You speak Aesir?”_ He asked. Loki's eyes darted everywhere, looking at everything except him.

_“Yes, sir,”_ she mumbled.

_“How old are you, Jotun?”_

_“Thirteen, sir.”_

_“What's your name?”_

_“It's...uh...”_ She lifted her sleeve and tried to read the numbers of her tattoo upside-down. Even after all this time she still didn't have it memorized. _“Five one two nine—”_

_“Your name, not your number! Stupid girl.”_ The guard behind him started laughing. 

_“It's Loki, sir.”_

_“Lucky? Heh, a lot of good that did you.”_

_“No, Loki. L-o-k—”_

_“I heard you the first time. God, you're stupid.”_ He could see her eyes starting to water. Whether it was from fear or his insult, he didn't know or care. He moved his hand to his waist and unholstered his pistol. She let out a whimper, then tried to hold her breath when he placed the gun in between her breasts. _“Can you sing, Jotun?”_

_“I-I think so.”_ She wasn't looking at him when she answered. Her attention was focused on the pistol.

_“Can you or can't you?!”_

_“I can!”_ He moved the pistol to the side so that the barrel of the gun was encircling her left nipple. 

_“Today is my birthday. I want you to sing for me,”_ he said as he applied pressure. She shuddered and gripped the table behind her. 

_“Please...”_ What was she pleading with him for? To not kill her? _To_ kill her? To leave her alone? Loki didn't know why she said it.

He moved the pistol back to where it had been before, then he slid it up her chest to her throat. Loki had to keep herself from swallowing.

_“Careful, Odinson. She'll piss herself if you keep that up,”_ the other guard said jokingly.

_“If she does, I'll have to shoot her.”_ He growled and gripped her hair, pulling her head back. _“You're singing to me, not the floor.”_

There was a constant stream of tears sliding down Loki's cheeks. She tried to stop them or else she might not be able to form words. When she felt she had more control over her emotions, Loki closed her eyes and started to sing.

The entire time, Loki prayed that she sang all the right words. She prayed that she sang all the right notes. She prayed that he would approve of the song. 

When the song ended, she opened each eye one at a time, hesitant to watch his reaction at all. Instead of a cocky smirk or frown of displeasure, he was looking at her strangely. It was as if he had discovered something truly amazing, but he was too overcome with awe to tell anyone. He slowly released his grip on her hair, then lowered the gun from her throat and replaced it in the holster. Then he quickly turned and walked to the front door, not saying a word.

_“Hey! Odinson!”_ The guard glared at her suspiciously as he walked past her, before running after his friend.

When they were gone, and the only people inside were the women working and the third guard, Loki dropped to her knees on the dirt floor. She clutched at her throat, sucked in a shallow breath, and wept.


	3. Chapter 3

When the work day ended and the guards led the women back to their quarters, Loki was about ready to collapse. Not only because she had been standing the entire day, but also because she'd had a gun pointed at her. Unlike some of the others working in Valhalla, she didn't walk out carrying any clothing. The thought of stealing from her own people, a lot of them having been shot in the courtyard before the train even left, was disgusting to her. She tried to find any of her family's possessions, but as far as she was concerned, they could have been picked off by her co-workers.

Loki was so tired that she was about to fall asleep as soon as she got inside, but she knew it was vital that she eat supper, whatever it may be. It turned out to be a small slice of hard black bread, a lopsided hunk of cheese that had fur growing on it, and dirty water. What was in the water, nobody knew, nor did they ask. Water was water.

After everyone finished eating, the single light bulb hanging from the ceiling was switched off, leaving the cabin in complete darkness. As tired as Loki was, she was unable to block out the sobs and sounds in the night. One of the women sharing her bed talked in her sleep, shouting the name “Egdir” over and over again. Loki normally would have covered her head with a pillow, but they didn't have pillows. All they had were their arms and each other.

The morning came, and breakfast was distributed. There was no drink, and the only thing to eat was a brown mush with chunks in it. Some of the women thought it might have been vomit, others feces. It turned out to be dog food. They had to use their hands.

It was raining again, but not quite as hard as it had been the day they arrived. By the afternoon, the ground would be nearly impossible to walk on, for those not wearing thick leather boots.

The women she roomed with never talked to each other, so there were no discussions about what their jobs were like or how they were treated. It was hard enough having nightmares about watching their families die from a bullet wound to the head, they didn't want to dwell on their own situation during the day. Even if Loki wanted to talk to somebody, she didn't know any of these women. They weren't her close neighbors, and she had never seen them before until they were pulled off the train.

When Loki entered Valhalla, she was wet, cold, and her dress was clinging to her skin. Water dripped from her hair into her eyes, and it wouldn't stay in the ponytail that she made using a shoelace. That was the only thing from Valhalla she stole, and she figured nobody would miss it. The dress they gave her was too big, but the women were all probably given the same size. Because of the rain, the water was pulling it down and uncovering her right shoulder. Always the right one because it was her dominant arm.

It was the same as the day before, except Loki felt sick after eating the dog food with no beverage to wash it down. From the glassy looks on her co-workers' faces, their breakfast didn't sit well with them either. 

A guard walked in carrying a sack that looked pretty heavy. It made an odd jingling sound when it moved. He set it down on a table near the back of the room, where the other two guards were watching, then he sat in a chair. The drunk guard from yesterday was sober, but the smell of alcohol still clung to him like feathers in tar.

_“That's a lot. Are those just from today?”_ He asked the guard who had been carrying the bag.

_“Yeah. And last night. I guess there were a bunch of runners. Stupid shits.”_ Loki wasn't sure what they were talking about, what was in the bag that made that sound. _“Who knew that so many Jotuns had gold teeth? Or could afford 'em.”_

Loki's legs gave out from under her and she brought a hand to her mouth, not just to keep from vomiting but to make sure they didn't try to knock out her teeth. They wouldn't because she didn't have any gold teeth, but they could still be cruel.

The guard was just about to get out of his chair, but the now-sober one put his hand up.

_“I'll take care of it.”_ The other guard merely shrugged. When he walked over to where Loki was on her knees, he nudged her in the side with his boot. _“Get up, Lucky.”_ When she didn't move, he grabbed her arm and pulled her up, then started dragging her towards the front door.

_“Hey Odinson, what are you doing?”_

_“I said I'd take care of it.”_ He walked her around the side of the building, then to another building, which appeared to be abandoned. They stopped when they were on the far side of the shabby structure, and after checking to make sure nobody was nearby, the guard let go of her arm and turned his back towards her. _“Alright, go ahead.”_

Loki hunched over and her vomit was the same color as the mud. Her breath tasted like dog food and fear. She tried not to get any on her legs or clothing, but some of it splattered when it splashed in the rain water. By the time she was done, she was leaning against the wall of the building and it felt like someone had shoved a hairbrush down her throat.

_“Done?”_

_“Yes, sir.”_ Her voice was muffled because she had covered her mouth with her hand again. The guard noticed the odd sound and turned around to look.

_“Are you going to be sick again?”_

_“No, sir. I don't want them to take my teeth.”_ He had the gall to laugh.

_“Lucky, do you have gold teeth or crowns?”_ Loki shook her head. _“Then you don't need to worry about losing your teeth.”_ She lowered her hand, but she was still looking at the ground.

_“Yes, sir.”_

_“Only military personnel use the word 'sir.' Call me Thor.”_

_“I don't think that would be appropriate.”_

_“Why not?”_ He asked petulantly.

_“Because it is too casual. And, well, you pointed a gun at me. I'm not going to talk to you as if we're friends after you threatened me.”_ The guard nodded curtly and averted his gaze.

_“I've been told I turn into an asshole when I'm drunk.”_ Loki didn't find it funny, but she finally looked up at him when she spoke. 

_“I don't think we could ever be friends. Your people murder and persecute those who are different from you. If everyone was the same, the world would be very dull.”_

For a long time he was silent, and that made Loki nervous. She couldn't even imagine what thoughts were going through his head. She knew she'd said too much, but he tricked her into expressing her beliefs. Her mother warned her that it was going to get her killed someday, and that day probably wasn't too far away.

_“I need to make it look good.”_

Before Loki could ask what he meant, he brought the back of his hand across her cheek, and she fell into the mud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Egdir (or Eggther) is a real person from Norse Mythology. He is a giant who plays a harp while the rooster, Fjalar, crows. This takes place just before the beginning of Ragnarok. And now you know.


	4. Chapter 4

When Loki walked into Valhalla, she had a pink mark on her right cheek. She had a busted lip because Thor forgot about the ring on his middle finger. He did apologize to her for that, but it didn't change the fact that it hurt and _she had a busted lip_. 

Loki's dress, arms and legs were covered with mud and vomit. As far as she knew, the only people in the camps who had access to a washing machine and shower were the guards. The only way Loki might get clean would be to stand in the rain for several hours and scratch the dirt off with her nails, but that would most likely make her sick. Loki chewed on her bottom lip and blood filled her mouth. She bit down again. She was thirsty, and it was the only fluid she'd consumed this morning.

_“When you said you would take care of it, you didn't disappoint,”_ the guard in the chair said haughtily. _“I kinda wish I had been there to watch.”_

_“Well, next time I'll let you do it.”_ Thor glanced over and saw that Loki was holding a skirt in her hands, but she wasn't doing anything with it. _“Stop listening and start working!”_ He gripped the back of her neck and brought her head down against the table. It wasn't as painful as it could have been, because her head was cushioned by piles of clothes, but it still made her dizzy. 

After that, Loki tuned the guards out as much as possible. Luckily for her, they didn't talk to her again until the work day was over. The women were giving her strange looks, and it was hard to tell if they were staring at her bruised face or the mud, which she seemed to be wearing as a second skin. Loki didn't care about what any of them thought. She was here to survive, not impress people with her looks. 

Unbeknownst to Loki, she had already managed to do just that.

Loki ate her supper without tasting it. Actually it didn't have a taste. Even if it had been roasted chicken, all she wanted to do was eat it and fall asleep. She felt even more exhausted now than she had at this time the previous day. She didn't have a gun pointed at her today, but she did vomit, have a guard slap her and bust her lip, then she took a mud bath. And this guard actually believed that she would talk to him using his first name. The very idea was preposterous.

For the next few weeks, Loki remained mostly silent, unless somebody addressed her first or she was told to translate. She tried to avoid drawing attention to herself, and to avoid any potential confrontation with the guard again. His sudden changes in mood and behavior were rather puzzling and difficult to follow. Not that she was reading into it, of course.

After her first month of working in the camp, she now had cramped fingers that became stiff and trembled. One morning she was holding a suitcase and her hands locked up; she dropped the suitcase on her foot and lost a toenail. So the guards wouldn't berate her for being clumsy, Loki said nothing and tried to act normal. The blood soaked through her shoe, and by the afternoon it was hard and falling apart. When she left work that day, she tried her best not to limp on that foot, but she grimaced from the pain. Thor noticed, but he didn't mention it.

She had lost weight, but she didn't know how much. Even though they had been told if their work output was good they would be rewarded with more rations, it was of course a lie. The guards only said these things to make them work harder and lead them on with false hopes.

Loki thought about her family every day, wondering if her father and brothers were still alive. Wondering if her sister and nephew were safe and healthy. And she missed her mother terribly. Loki watched her die, and the train car had felt empty without her.

One of the women who worked in Valhalla died during the night; the forty-year-old. Loki hadn't known it before, but after she learned the truth, it seemed so obvious. Whenever a prisoner died, their camp-issued clothes were removed from their body, then the corpse was taken to the burn pile that was located a few miles from the camp, close to the border of the woods. The clothes of the dead people were saved for the next group of prisoners that were brought in the train. They never washed them. Loki wondered how many girls wore this dress before she did.

Another group of prisoners was brought on the train, and the women gathered along the barbed-wire fence to see if they knew anyone. Loki looked for her sister, but she didn't recognize any of them. It wasn't that Loki wanted her sister to be locked up in here, but she missed her and wanted to see someone familiar.

More people died on the train this time, as opposed to when Loki came, because the living conditions had become much worse and there was next to no food for anyone. Many of the Jotuns went into hiding, taken in by Aesir and Vanir who opposed the war and supported the oppressed. The Jotuns were captured and the traitors were executed.

The soldier from before told her to translate for this new group, and Loki wondered how they had ever gotten by before she arrived.

There were three new girls assigned to work in Valhalla. Skadi, whose father was in the men's camp; Angrboda, who had no family there; and Gerd, whose husband was a Vanir soldier. Skadi was fiery and stubborn, Angrboda was serious and taciturn, Gerd was foolish and reckless. The first day they came to work, Gerd was telling those nearest to her about how her husband was fighting on the front lines for the Vanir, when a guard quickly came over. It was the one who carried the golden teeth.

_“Who said that? I heard 'Vanir'!”_ He turned to Loki. _“What did she say?”_

_“She said she wishes the Vanir would surrender so that the war will come to an end.”_ Loki hoped he believed her, and he did.

_“Tell her that surrender is not an option. The war won't be over until all of the Vanir are dead. Go on,”_ he said smugly. Loki turned back to Gerd and let out a breath.

“You need to be careful. Never say that word again. They will think you're a Vanir supporter and may find out you're married to one. They will punish you, brutally. Now look scared.”

Gerd didn't need to be told, because she was terrified. She lowered her head and went back to work. The guard seemed satisfied, so he turned around and walked back to his chair.

_“What was that about?”_ Thor asked.

_“Oh, that dumb bitch thinks that the war will end if the Vanir surrender. Can you believe that shit?”_

When the work day ended, the women filed out of the building to be taken back to their cabin. Gerd looked like she had been to Hell and back. That was almost the case; she had been to Hell, but she was still there. Just as Loki was about to walk outside, a hand grabbing her arm stopped her.

_“Not you, Lucky.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In mythology, Gerd is a giantess who is sought after by Freyr. He sends his servant, Skirnir, to try and make her agree to be his wife. At first she refuses, but eventually she consents. There is a lot more to this story but I won't bore you.


	5. Chapter 5

Loki's shoulders drooped and she pressed her lips together in a thin line. Reluctantly, she turned around and faced the three guards. It was the guard with the golden teeth who spoke next.

 _“We have a job for you.”_ Because the one she had now apparently wasn't enough. _“You're going to listen to the prisoners' conversations and report back to us any plans of uprisings or rebellions.”_

 _“No.”_ He looked shocked. _“I would rather wear the badge of a corpse than the badge of a traitor. I won't spy on my people. Would you spy on your own?”_

 _“If the pay is good,”_ he said with a shrug.

_“Well, you're not paying me. So I have no reason to—”_

_“We'll give you better rations.”_

_“You said that the first day. I'm not going to rat on my people just so I can have one more bite of dog food or moldy cheese.”_ Loki knew she was making a mistake. It was rare that prisoners were offered higher rations, and they never refused. But Loki's conscience won against her common sense. _“I need to go before I get in trouble for leaving my group.”_

 _“I'll take her,”_ Thor said exasperatedly and rolled his eyes. _“If we had talked to her about this during the day, we wouldn't have this problem.”_

_“Shove your rifle up your ass, Odinson.”_

After they left the building, they walked side by side. Loki could feel him staring at her, and when her eyes flicked up towards him, she saw that he was looking at her bare shoulder. She quickly reached up and adjusted her dress, which had grown on her. Actually she had just gotten smaller.

_“You should've taken the deal.”_

_“I'm not a traitor. Unlike you, I have morals and a healthy, beating heart.”_ The door to the cabin was open, but she turned towards him again before going inside. _“All you have is a void, cold and black and empty.”_

After the door closed behind her, Thor still remained outside, staring at the rotting wood.

_“That's not true.”_

Loki didn't sleep at all that night. She was too worried that she might be reported for disobeying an order from the guards, or talking back to them. And she couldn't even put a name to what she did to the one who walked her back. Loki still refused to call him by name, even if she was merely thinking about him, which she tried not to do very often.

When she wasn't taken away during the night and beaten to death, Loki thought it was a good start. But they might have been waiting to do it in the morning, so everyone could see. She was getting ahead of herself, and she really needed to put any fear behind. If they think she's afraid, they'll only continue to poke at her. But she was afraid; she would be lying to say that she wasn't.

Loki knew there had to be something wrong when she walked into Valhalla the next morning and none of the guards spoke to her. They didn't even look at her. She tried to ignore the static aura in the room, but she felt like if she made one mistake, she would be struck down by some all-powerful force. 

For the entire day, she felt imaginary knives slowly being pushed into her skin, all over her body. Every so often, the blades would be twisted slightly and pushed further. At one point, Loki swore she could feel the knives scraping against her bones, and she could even hear the sound. One of the knives in her back had broken through to the other side, and she could see the point lifting her dress.

 _“Alright sluts, you're done for the day,”_ the guard in the chair drawled. Loki had gotten in the habit of calling him chair-guard, not only because she didn't know his name, but because he was always sitting down. Thor was drunk-guard, even though he had only been drunk that one time, but that one time was enough to make an impression. And the third was quiet-guard, because he never talked. _“You lot had better try harder tomorrow, because this isn't even enough to pay for a goddamn car,”_ he shouted when he saw what little gold they collected. What he didn't seem to understand was that they may have found all of it, and they weren't going to pull gold out of thin air. All they could do was wait for the next train to come, which would be any day now.

Drunk-guard came around to collect all of their findings. At the end of every work day, one of the guards would pour their pails into a large sack, and they weren't allowed to leave until everyone's pails had been emptied. If there was a worker who had no gold, or hardly any gold, she would first be searched to make sure she wasn't trying to steal it. Then she would have to stay and keep searching until her pail was completely full. The guards were always very thorough in their search, because supposedly there was a girl in the past who tried to sneak gold out by hiding it in her genitals.

Loki kept her head down when he stopped next to her, and after he placed her empty pail on the table and moved onto the next person, she let out a breath. While she tried to remain completely still, her body was able to relax a little. Loki noticed something was at the bottom of her pail, and after making sure none of the guards were looking, she quickly reached in and grabbed it. It was a folded piece of paper, which Loki definitely hadn't put in there. The pails are only for gold and jewelry. It must have fallen out of drunk-guard's coat pocket or something. 

Loki tucked the paper into her shoe, and when they were led outside, she pulled it out. She held the paper close to her chest, so she didn't draw too much attention to herself. Then she slowly unfolded it. Loki was trembling with anticipation, wondering what it could be. Maybe it was an important letter to or from a high-ranking official. Or maybe it was top-secret information about a new weapon that was being paid for with the collected gold and jewelry. Or it could just be a letter from is family. Either way, Loki's curiosity was getting the better of her.

When it was fully open and visible to her, she almost stopped walking.

_'I have fallen in love with you.'_

A lump formed in Loki's throat and her eyes started to water. She tore the note into strips then let them fall from her hands. The guard's declaration of love was now in shreds, being trampled into the mud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got the idea of the girl hiding gold in her genitals from an episode of _C.O.P.S._ where a lady was hiding cocaine in hers. I don't know if anything like that ever happened, but I mentioned I get ideas from weird places.
> 
> And the note thing actually did happen. Not exactly the same as my version, but Franz slipped Helena a note saying he loved her and she tore it up.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has gore and explicit content that some people may find too graphic for them. Can't say I didn't warn you.

Loki was deeply upset. _More_ than upset, really. She absolutely did not want to go back into work this morning, and she was tempted to ask for a work transfer. But those probably didn't even exist. All she could do was tough it out and make it seem as if nothing happened. Just as long as Thor did the same thing.

When she first walked in, Loki immediately noticed that somebody was missing. She looked around, counting all of the women and noting who all was there, and she figured out Gerd was absent. As far as she knew, Gerd hadn't died. Then she heard the scream.

All of the women crowded near the door, a few of them walking outside, and they saw a guard dragging a prisoner by her hair. Obviously it was Gerd, since she hadn't shown up to work.

“I didn't do anything wrong! I've done everything you've asked!” She sobbed, clawing at the guard's hand and trying to pry it off her head.

_“You're a spy, aren't you? Don't try to deny it, I happen to know you're married to one of those Vanir scum!”_

“Let me go! I just want to go to work, please!” Her eyes connected with Loki's from across the yard. “Tell him! Tell him I've done nothing wrong!”

Loki was hesitant to intervene. First, because it could end badly for both of them. Second, she was curious as to how the guard found out about Gerd's husband if none of them understood their language. Again, Loki's conscience got in the way of her common sense, and she found herself walking over to the two of them.

_“Sir, this girl is not a spy.”_ She flinched when he rounded on her, but she quickly gathered her nerves. _“Yes, she is married to a Vanir, but she is not a spy. How could she possibly be one from in here?”_

_“Are you one, too? Huh?”_

_“No, sir.”_

_“Are you her friend, Jotun?”_

_“No, sir. I barely know her.”_ She didn't like the sneer on his face.

_“I don't believe you. You Jotuns are all a bunch of liars.”_

_“I'm telling the truth.”_

_“Alright, Jotun. Prove to me that you're not a spy and you don't care about her.”_

_“What do I have to do?”_

_“You don't have to do anything except watch.”_

Loki wished that she had just minded her own business. Now he was going to rape Gerd in front of her, in front of everyone. Even if Loki hadn't intervened, he may have planned to do that anyway. 

The guard let go of Gerd's hair and she dropped to the ground. Instead of grabbing at her clothes or any part of her body, he hit her in the face with the butt of his rifle. There was a loud crack when it struck bone. Gerd tried to reach up and cover her face, but he had already hit her again. Her cries of pain were quieted when his rifle was thrust into her mouth and down her throat, breaking most of her teeth. 

All Loki could do was watch in dismay as the poor girl was bludgeoned to death. She would flinch every time blood splattered and landed on her. By the time the guard was finished, all that was left was a bloody mass of flesh, bone, and two eyes dangling from their sockets. Loki dropped to her knees and brought a hand up to her mouth.

_“If you throw up, I'll do the same thing to you.”_

Loki's eyes moved down and saw the indentation on Gerd's finger where her wedding ring used to be before the Aesir took it from her at the gate. Loki reached for that hand and rubbed her thumb over the ringless finger. She then glared up at the guard.

_“What is wrong with you? She wasn't causing anyone any harm!”_

The guard brought the butt of his rifle down, and Loki held up her arm to shield the blow. She clutched her arm to her chest when the bone was snapped in two, and the rifle then hit her in the back along her spinal column.

_“What the hell is going on here?!”_ Thor overslept this morning, and when he was close to Valhalla and saw all of the workers standing outside, he knew something was wrong.

_“Hey, Odinson. Just teaching these whores what happens when they get smart with us. And what we do to spies.”_

_“They work in Valhalla, therefore they are under MY jurisdiction and are MY responsibility! Your job is to dispose of corpses, not make them! And you do NOT have the authority to deal out punishment to prisoners who are not assigned to you!”_ The guard said nothing. _“You're going to clean up that mess and CARRY the corpse to the burn pile. Another guard will go with you to make sure no one assists you, nor do you use any vehicle to get there. Is that understood?”_

_“Yeah okay, Odinson.”_

_“Then you'd better fucking start walking.”_ The other guard cursed under his breath, then picked Gerd's corpse up and flung her over his shoulder. She was positioned on her back so the bloody remains of her face wouldn't touch his uniform. _“Get up, Lucky. We need to get your arm fixed.”_

Loki stood up and kept a firm grip on her arm. The bone had broken through the skin, and she was trying to stop the bleeding as much as she could, but it didn't do much good. As they headed towards the medical facility, all of the bystanders turned and walked back inside to return to their jobs. 

While they were waiting for the doctor, Thor let out a sigh.

_“Why did you have to get involved?”_

_“He knew.”_

The doctor came in and immediately started working. He didn't ask questions about how it happened, because it wasn't important to him. And because he hated Jotuns, so he wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. But his job was helping the injured, and an injured person was brought to him.

_“What did you mean earlier when you said he knew?”_

_“Someone told him about her husband.”_

_“So what are you saying?”_

_“Hold her down,”_ the doctor commanded. Thor and Loki both looked at him with confused expressions. _“Hold. Her. Down.”_

This time they didn't argue, and when Loki was on her back, she focused on counting the white ceiling tiles and tried to keep her breathing calm. Thor had his hands on her left arm and right shoulder, but he could tell she was still frightened.

_“What were you going to tell me?”_ He asked, trying to distract her.

_“Th-there is a g-guard here who knows our language. He_ —AAH!” 

Loki bit down on her lip so hard that it started to bleed when the doctor began forcing the broken bones back into her arm. He then inserted a needle and thread, and once the flesh had been sewn back together, he quickly started wrapping gauze around her arm to make a cast. Thor moved the hand from Loki's arm to her wrist, and she quickly pulled free only to grab his hand so tightly that his fingers were turning white. When the arm was completely wrapped in a tight cast, Loki breathed slowly so she could try to talk again.

_“He overheard Gerd talking about...how she was married...to a Vanir soldier, and he must have told the others,”_ she said through gritted teeth. Then a thought occurred to her. _“As far as I know, the women in Valhalla...are the only ones who know about that. I don't think she told anybody in the cabin. I had warned her not...to mention it again, because the word 'Vanir' could get her in trouble.”_

_“So you think it was somebody in Valhalla?”_ Loki nodded. _“Well, it wasn't me. And while Tyr is loyal to the cause and good at his job, he has a brain the size of a mustard seed.”_ She didn't need to ask who he meant. That left only one other person.

_“The guard who never talks?”_ He scowled.

_“My dopey half-brother, Vali. Father requested that we be assigned to the same location. He's almost twenty years old and my parents still coddle him.”_

_“But could it have been him?”_ Loki interrupted. He appeared to be thinking it over.

_“I'll go through his things and see if he has a Jotun dictionary.”_

_“He won't get mad?”_

_“Nah, he's used to it.”_ Loki had something else she wanted to ask him, and even though it could earn her a slap to the face, she needed to know.

_“Why are you helping me?”_

_“You really need to ask?”_

Loki looked down at their joined hands. This time she didn't pull away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The guard who murdered Gerd is based on the Sonderkommandos, who were Jewish prisoners assigned with disposing of corpses of those who died in the gas chambers. I just came up with this idea literally within the last few seconds, but guards assigned to this particular job are Aesir who are convicted felons and criminals prior to arriving at the camps. They don't have military training and discipline like Thor and the others do, they are from very poor families, and they are viewed as inferior and basically the same level as the prisoners.


	7. Chapter 7

The next evening, at the end of the work day, Thor left Loki another note when he took up the gold collection. She was dreading what it was going to say, but she knew it had nothing to do with personal feelings. On the way back to the cabin, she unfolded the paper.

_'I found nothing.'_

Loki's entire frame sagged in disappointment. She had been so certain that Vali was the one who told the other guard about Gerd's husband. She scratched at the cast and berated herself for blocking the rifle with her dominant arm. It would be a long time before the doctor could remove it.

Loki clenched her left hand into a fist and shook her head.

“No. I know I'm right. It has to be him. There's no one else it could be,” she muttered to herself. She tore the note into shreds so, should it be found, nobody else would be able to read it. 

This mindset kept her up the entire night, and by morning she could barely keep her eyes open. She nearly fell asleep in the middle of breakfast, but she managed to make it all the way through. That was not the case when she got to work. About two hours in, her legs couldn't support her anymore. On her way to the floor, she hit the side of her head against the table, and her vision swam.

 _“Get up, Lucky. We don't pay you to sit on your ass,”_ Thor drawled. Chair-guard, or Tyr as Loki now knew, barked out a laugh. When Loki didn't stand, Thor harrumphed. _“Get up, damn you!”_

_“Hey Odinson, let's give your brother a chance. All he does is stand in the corner and brood.”_ Tyr looked over his shoulder towards Vali and smirked. _“Well? Are you up for the challenge?”_

Vali's only response to his question was a glare. He wordlessly moved away from his post against the wall and approached Loki, still sitting on the floor. Without telling her to get up, he gripped her arm and yanked her to a standing position effortlessly. Even though he was the youngest guard assigned to this location, it was easy for him to lift her because she weighed hardly anything at all. Loki didn't know what he planned on doing, but she was thankful he was right handed or else he would have grabbed her injured arm.

Just when she had managed to stand comfortably on both feet, he shoved her against the nearest wall and held her there by the throat. The other women murmured to each other and attempted to discreetly back away to the other side of the room. Vali applied pressure with his palm, and Loki grabbed at his wrist and hand to try and loosen his grip. He pressed harder, then pushed her up the wall so she was dangling a foot above the floor. Loki's vision was becoming blurry, and soon all that she could see anymore were faint browns, vague outlines of people, and a pair of cold, dark eyes burning with malice.

Then Loki saw it. All the proof she needed, and it was literally staring her in the face.

 _“Alright, Vali, that's enough!”_ Thor shouted. Judging by the tone and volume of his voice, this wasn't the first time he'd said anything. Vali let go and Loki landed on the floor with a loud thud. She could feel the indentations from his fingers around her neck. _“Go outside and walk it off. I'm not asking.”_

As silent as ever, he made his way towards the entrance of the building. The women all backed against the far wall when he walked by, too frightened to even breathe.

 _“Holy shit,”_ Tyr muttered.

 _“Well, did that quench your thirst?”_ Thor asked sarcastically. Tyr rounded on him, his eyes huge.

 _“Holy shit, your brother is crazy!”_ Thor shook his head, then turned his attention to Loki.

 _“Can you stand, Lucky?”_ Loki nodded, then slowly used the table to pull herself up. _“Don't stay up so late from now on.”_

Loki wasn't paying attention to what he was saying. She was trying to figure out a way to tell him what she knew. She picked up a blouse and tore off the tag, then looked around for anything she could use to write with. She found nothing, so she needed to improvise again. 

Loki bit down on her lip, then kept chewing on it until the skin split. She pulled the shoelace from her hair, then brought one end up to her bleeding lip. After scribbling two letters, she would need more blood, and after the first nine letters were written, she couldn't produce anymore from her lip. 

She looked around again, then saw a splintered board in the table. She scraped her knuckles on the sharp edge, then used the blood from each finger to try and finish the message. Loki only hoped that it was still legible once it was dry. Luckily, it was. Now all she had to do was wait for Thor to come by for the gold collection.

Her bottom lip was numb, and her knuckles throbbed whenever she curled her fingers. There wasn't much blood from her knuckles, so she didn't have to worry about getting any on the clothes. Not that the guards really cared if prisoner clothing was clean or dirty. The Aesir thought everything that belonged to Jotuns was dirty. 

It felt to Loki as if the work day would never end, but finally it did, and she couldn't wait to see what Thor's response would be. Vali never came back, and the other two guards didn't bother to go look for him. 

Loki waited to make sure it would be Thor who came around, because sometimes it was either of the guards. When he started at the front of the room, Loki dropped the shirt tag in her pail. She kept her head down, just like all of the other girls did, and when he stopped next to her she had to refrain from looking at him. He tucked the tag in the pocket of his trousers, making it appear as if he was scratching his leg.

_“Alright, you all can go. Except you, Lucky. I need to talk to you.”_

_“Want me to stay?”_ Tyr asked.

_“Nah, you go ahead and go to dinner. I think they're making your favorite tonight.”_

_“Pulled pork?”_ Thor nodded. _“Fuck yeah!”_

 _“Hey, you mind taking this with you?”_ Thor asked, holding up the bag of the day's gold collection.

 _“Sure, Odinson.”_ Tyr took the bag from Thor and walked towards the door, whistling. When all of the workers were gone and the door was closed, Thor stood near Loki and leaned against the wall where Vali had almost choked her to death, then he pulled the tag out and looked at it. He noticed that the message had been scribbled in blood, and his eyes flicked up to her lips. He made no comment.

 _“'Who is his mother?'”_ Thor looked at her strangely. _“Why do you wanna know about Vali's mother?”_

 _“Do you know anything about her?”_ Loki asked, rather than answering his question.

 _“Hmm, not really. Dad would get all upset whenever I asked,”_ Thor answered, scratching the back of his head.

_“Does Vali know who she is?”_

_“Yeah, I think so. Why?”_ Loki looked up at him with eyes that had just seen the Devil.

_“Because his mother is a Jotun.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In Norse mythology, there are two Valis: the son of Loki and Sigyn, and the son of Odin and the giantess Rind. Vali Odinson grew to be an adult within the timespan of one day, and his purpose was to kill Hodr after he *accidentally* killed Baldr (thanks Loki). Really all else that is known about him is that he survives Ragnarok. And now you know.


	8. Chapter 8

Thor looked at her as if she had worms crawling out of her ears.

_“Are you serious?”_ Loki nodded. _“Well, what makes you think that?”_

_“His eyes gave him away.”_

_“His eyes?”_

_“Yes. Aesir have light blue eyes, but Vali has dark eyes like a Jotun's.”_

_“Well, I don't usually find myself staring into men's eyes,”_ Thor said jokingly.

_“You don't believe me.”_

_“I can't just accuse my brother of something because he's a creep. I need solid proof.”_ Loki scowled at him.

_“I know I'm right. And I can't just allow him to spread rumors, whether they are valid or not, so he can watch my people be killed off one by one.”_ Loki let out a sigh. _“But I'm only a prisoner, so I can't do anything even if I wanted to.”_

_“Why do you think he wants the prisoners to be purposely killed? We don't murder prisoners for no legitimate reason.”_

_“Because he's ashamed of his parentage. All half-breeds feel the same way.”_ Thor also let out a sigh, then laid a hand on her shoulder.

_“All I can do is watch him. I want to help, but I can't say I heard about it from one of the prisoners. It wouldn't look good for either of us.”_ Loki didn't say anything because she was looking at the watch on Thor's wrist.

_“That's my father's watch.”_ Thor moved his hand and looked to the side.

_“Well, he doesn't need it now.”_

_“No, it didn't belong to him. He made it. I recognize his design.”_ Thor held his arm still as Loki unclasped the strap and removed the watch. She turned it over and showed him the cursive “F” engraved into the metal. _“My father's name is, or was, Farbauti. He carved his initial into the back of all his watches and clocks.”_

_“He made watches?”_

_“And fixed them. But that was before we were moved into the ghettos. He had to sell his shop, not only to support our six-member household, but because he knew nobody would do business with him anymore.”_ Loki handed the watch back to him and allowed a thin smile. _“Even if you did steal it from somebody, at least you keep it polished.”_

Thor's head shot up when he heard footsteps on the wooden staircase outside.

_“Somebody's coming.”_ He didn't have much time to give Loki instructions, so he played it by ear. He bunched the front of her dress up in his hand, and he held the watch in front of her face. _“If I catch you trying to steal anything again, I'll set my brother loose on you. And this time I won't interfere.”_

_“Hey Odinson, you coming to eat?”_ Tyr asked from the doorway. Thor looked up at the other guard and nodded once.

_“Yeah, just give me a minute.”_

_“Well you'd better hurry up, I think they're almost out of food.”_ He was obviously joking, but Thor just wanted him to leave. When Thor didn't say anything else, Tyr shrugged and walked back outside. When the door was closed and he couldn't hear the other man's footsteps, Thor released a sigh.

_“I didn't mean that, you know,”_ Thor admitted as he released his grip on Loki's dress. _“I would never let Vali do that again.”_

_“I know. You needed to make it look good,”_ Loki replied as she flattened the front of her dress.

Thor knew she was making fun of him, from that time behind the abandoned shed. But he wasn't going to hit her this time, since she looked bruised and beat up enough already. And he didn't want to hurt her. What he couldn't figure out was why she wasn't angry with him for striking her, chastising and publicly humiliating her. She must have known somehow that he was merely putting on a show.

_“You're staring into space. What are you thinking about?”_

He hesitated, wondering if he should tell her the truth or make something up.

_“It's nothing. Nothing important.”_ Thor lifted a hand and held a section of her hair. He allowed the long black curls to slip through his fingers, despite it being caked with dirt and sweat and rainwater. She looked up at him with a puzzled expression. _“I like it down.”_ Loki shook her head and took a step away from him. She then picked up the shoelace from the table and tied it around her hair.

_“It gets in the way. The only reason why I haven't cut it is because my mother said she loved my hair long.”_

_“Where is she now? Somewhere in the camp?”_

_“No. She died on the train.”_ Thor lowered his gaze, and he seemed reluctant to say anything more, in case he might upset her. _“I think I should go back to the cabin. And you haven't had dinner yet.”_

Again, Thor was bewildered at how she could say things like that, and yet her words held no hint of malice in them. It wasn't that she felt nothing, because all of the prisoners in the camp would love more than anything to eat the way the guards did. But it was the way she said it; it made her seem older than thirteen years.

_“You're right. I kept you too long.”_ He didn't want to stop talking to her, but his job wasn't to talk to the prisoners, unless it was to insult or degrade them.

When they left Valhalla, there was nobody else in the yard. All of the other prisoners were in their quarters and most of the guards were still eating and drinking, in the shower room, or they were getting ready for the night shift. They were almost to the cabin when Loki spoke again.

_“The next time you need to push me around, try to be more careful of my right arm.”_

Thor set his hand on the back of her head and gave a little shove, making her stumble. It was meant as a joke, but Loki still wasn't expecting it. She turned her head around to glare at him, and he had some of her hair wrapped around his fingers again. Whatever reproachful comment she had planned on saying to him was lost on her tongue. She settled instead on saying nothing and going into her quarters.

While Loki nibbled at her food, she tried to clear her mind of all that happened in Valhalla. Not just her conversation with the guard afterward; she still felt uncomfortable with using his first name. He was a guard, she was a prisoner, and that was a good enough reason. 

What took place with Vali still frightened her. They never went to look for him, and she wondered where he had gone and where he was now. Loki was a full-blooded Jotun, so she couldn't really understand what it was like from Vali's standpoint. Even if she had been a half-breed, she would never want people killed because of it. But Loki wasn't a violent person anyway, and Vali was half-Aesir. Maybe he wasn't only embarrassed, but he was also worried that someone might find out and lock him up as well. 

Loki set her plate aside, not even sure what she had eaten because her mind was focused on other things. While today had been eventful, and not in a good way, she did have one thing to look forward to tomorrow. Another train would be arriving with new prisoners. Maybe her sister would be on it.


	9. Chapter 9

It was early in the morning when the train arrived. Just as before, the prisoners lined the fence to see if there was anyone on board that they knew. As more and more new people entered the gates, Loki became more and more disheartened that her sister was not among them. But then she saw the tall girl, a mirror image of their mother, just a few feet away. She had always been freakishly tall. Loki's adrenaline flared.

“Jarnsaxa!” Her sister looked up from the ground. “Jarnsaxa!” Recognition flashed across her face.

“Loki!” The siblings never broke eye contact, and Jarnsaxa moved towards the edge of the line to be closer to the fence. There was blood on the front of her shirt, all that remained of her newborn son.

_“Get back in line!”_ A soldier barked near the gate. _“I said get back in line!”_

The bullet missed Jarnsaxa's foot by mere inches, but it wasn't meant to actually harm her, only to get her attention. She looked at him, unsure of what he wanted, and she still hadn't started walking again.

“Jarnsaxa, keep walking! I'll see you soon!” Loki was gripping the fence so tightly that the barbs had cut into her palms and fingers. Her sister nodded weakly, then she turned around and started walking. As soon as the gates slammed shut, Loki turned around to go and find her sister. She was barely able to take a step when she crashed into someone.

_“Time to make yourself useful,”_ a soldier drawled. He was the one who always had her translate for the new arrivals. Loki tried not to react, because she would have sighed or slumped her shoulders.

_“Yes, sir,”_ she said, keeping her face blank.

Because this train arrived in the morning, the new prisoners were given their job assignments the same day so they could start working. When Loki came, the train arrived during the night.

After the women were in their dresses, the soldier pulled out his clipboard and started reading. While Loki translated, she would watch as they looked at their tattoos to see who had been called. When Jarnsaxa looked up, Loki's heart skipped a beat.

“Five-four-nine-two-nine-two-zero-one-five...barracks.” Loki tensed, not only because her sister would be working somewhere else, but because of _where_ she was working. The women who worked cleaning the barracks were at a higher risk of being raped by guards than anyone. 

Jarnsaxa didn't know why Loki looked so scared, but she figured it had to do with the job she'd been given. And due to the fact that there was no hint of a smile or expression of relief, it was obvious that they wouldn't be working together. When they were divided into their groups and being led away to their job locations, Loki shouted once more.

“Jarnsaxa, be careful! Please!” 

_“I'm done with you. Get out of here,”_ the soldier said, not even looking up from his clipboard.

_“Yes, sir.”_

When she walked into Valhalla, all Loki could think about was her sister. She was so unfocused that she almost went to the wrong table. After she caught herself and went to the correct workplace, Loki did nothing. She never moved once, and at the end of the day, it got her in serious trouble.

_“What the hell is this, Lucky?”_ Thor asked, holding the empty pail in front of her face.

“I'm sorry.”

_“Huh?”_

_“I'm sorry.”_ Loki, as well as the other women, flinched when he threw the pail to the floor.

_“Sorry's not gonna pay for weapons, Lucky! Only gold can do that, and I'm not seeing any!”_

_“Hey Odinson, why don't you search her?”_ Tyr asked, wriggling his eyebrows suggestively. Loki visibly stiffened.

_“Maybe I will,”_ Thor answered flatly. _“Get 'em out of here.”_

_“Everybody out! Come on, I know you can move faster than that!”_ Tyr shouted, clapping his hands and following the frightened women out of the building.

When the last person was gone, Thor shut the door. He then walked back over to the table and picked up Loki's pail. There was a dent in it from how hard he threw it.

_“Seriously though, what happened?”_ Instead of answering him, she went to her knees and covered her mouth with her hand. _“Loki?”_ That was the first time he had ever used her actual name.

_“She's in the barracks,”_ Loki managed to say.

_“Who?”_

_“My sister. She's the only family I have, and now she's...”_ Loki was breathing heavily, constantly wiping at her eyes. _“I know what happens there. What the guards do. I can't...I don't want her to—”_

Thor slid the strap on his rifle over his head and set it down on the table. He then got down in front of her and sat with his legs crossed, because he was so tall. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't request a prisoner to be transferred to a different job. It would seem suspicious, and he wouldn't be able to give a valid reason for doing so. Other than protecting the sister of the girl he loves from being raped by guards. But that sort of thing happened on a daily basis, even though it technically wasn't allowed. 

_“Do you know which cabin she's sleeping in?”_ Loki shook her head. _“I can't do anything about her job assignment, but I may be able to ensure that she's in your cabin.”_

_“You would really do that for me?”_ Thor nodded. He was slightly taken aback when she lunged forward and wrapped her arms around him, a bit awkwardly because of the bulky cast on her right arm. “Ow.”

_“Don't do that if it hurts.”_

The grin fell from his face when he heard someone walking up the wooden steps. He didn't have time to make a plan, so he pushed Loki down on her back and crouched over her on all fours. He clapped a hand over her mouth to muffle her breathing just as the door opened. The next few seconds went by as slowly as molasses dripping off a spoon. Thor closed his eyes and listened for any movement, listened to the person's breathing. They let out a huff before taking a couple steps.

_“Damn it, Odinson. Quit leaving the fucking light on,”_ Tyr grumbled before turning off the switch.

When he could no longer hear the other man's footsteps, Thor released a breath and moved his hand from Loki's mouth. He looked down at her, to ask if she was alright, but the words wouldn't form. The moon was shining through the window and making Loki's skin look pure white. Her bruised lips were red like a cardinal's feathers, and there were hints of blue in her hair. 

Thor couldn't breathe. He had felt like this once before, when she sang for him. The first time, she looked at him with fear. Now she was looking at him strangely, as if wondering what he was thinking about and if he was okay. 

Thor leaned forward so he was propped up on his elbow. When Loki didn't push him away or tell him to stop, he cupped the side of her face, then stroked her cheekbone with his thumb. Again, she said nothing, but her breathing sped up. It had gone well up to this point, so he kept going. 

Loki closed her eyes as soon as she felt his lips. For some time she doubted his sentiments towards her, but she knew now that he really did love her. If he didn't, he would be treating her just as cruelly as the other guards treat their victims. All he was doing was kissing her, and for the first time since she entered the camp, before that even, she was not afraid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I tend to avoid using clichés and try to use other forms of analogies that still make sense. Instead of saying "lips as red as blood" I used a cardinal's feathers. One, because blood is pretty fucking dark. Two, the blood comparison is over-used. And instead of saying "the seconds dragged by like hours" I used the molasses reference. Because molasses literally takes hours to drip from a spoon; and because I like molasses cookies and now I'm hungry. Also in chapter 3 instead of using the sandpaper cliché, I used a hairbrush. I mean can you imagine having a hairbrush shoved down your throat?


End file.
